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Untitled
26.6.11 || 9:17:00 AM
I think to be in love means breaking down your walls, surrendering a part of your heart, and having the courage to show your weaknesses to the other person; your partner should not judge you but instead they become your support system that helps strengthen you when you’re allowing a part of yourself to be open. Being in love is supposed to be gut-wrenching and heart-stopping in a beautiful kind of way. Love is supposed to make you go crazy and you should be able to view life in a much grander scale. The sky’s supposed to be brighter and the flowers should bloom even more. I think a person should see even more beauty of life when they’re in love.
-Cantika P.
that quote is just beautiful.
i quoted it from a senior who is really great at writing. and it's just beautiful.
to me, it happens to be true.
i've spent almost my entire life building walls, hiding pain, keeping story to myself.
i find it... 'unappealing' to show my weaknesses and make a fuss of something private.
i share only a little, and that too is only for certain closest people.
and even the closest people never get the full story. or what i truly feel about a certain issue.
when i feel really sad about something, and i happen to have or need to tell someone about it, i usually warn them in advance 'don't try to console me! don't say anything! do not comment!' in fear that if they do so, i might break down and cry my eyes out.
and that's what i try my best to avoid.
people say i'm a good listener: i don't push people to tell me what i wanna hear, but rather let them tell me what they wanna tell.
but when it comes to telling my own story?
nah. not my thing.
i just feel that i can't bother people with my stories and problems, they've got their own.
i'm the strong shoulder to cry on. i cannot, and i shouldn't, break down.
but as time goes by, and the burden starts to pile up on my shoulder, i find it harder to be so strong and be superhero myself.
and then this man came.
he showed me how stupid i am to put on a mask every time, and not letting even the closest ones know me.
*although he himself doesn't really like to tell his stories to people as well HAHA
but then just like that, we both learned to open up our selves.
he was really glad when i was willing to open a 'curhat' session with him, and vice versa.
we started to tell each other our stories; not only the 'haha-hihi' part of our selves, but also showing our weaknesses.
and along the way, we fell in love with each other.
i realized, when i've started to do this, there is no going back.
i've given him a part of me, sometimes it can be the most fragile one, knowingly that he can break it apart.
but i think, that's what it's all about.
if one wants to make a relationship works or moves into the next level, one needs to give him/herself to the partner.
of course, i personally think that in a relationship, still, there should be some parts of me i need to keep to myself. otherwise i might lose myself completely when *amitamit* things go awry and we need to go our separate way.
but nonetheless there needs to be some depth, some trust.
we need to have the courage to show our weaknesses, and to accept theirs as well as we accompany them, and support them along the way.
my significant other and i are in the process of learning this.
sometimes we are still unwilling to be seen weak in front of each other.
but event after event have shown that when we have enough courage to break down our walls and let the other one comes in, and more over understands, we discover something that makes our relationship stronger.
we see things a bit clearer, and everything seems to be even more beautiful.
so, Y, i know that we are both having our own problems now.
but as we always say to each other, we will always be together.
i'll be right there holding your hands as you'll be right here holding mine.
we'll support each other in our own battle. and we'll come out both winners.
be tough, kecoakman. (:
semangat semangaaaaaaat!
you will always be my supersuperhero.
i love you. ♥ :*
Labels: it's-so-me, justmylife, justmythought, love, quotes
